“My future is so much brighter and I have made stronger and lifelong friendships”
Moving on successfully
- IT sales
- Probation officer
- Security guard
- Care work
Just £20 a week feeds a homeless young person at Amber
How my love for my son helped me turn my life around.
“I came to Amber because I had to change my life, I was taking drugs, Heroin, Crack and Speed…you name it I was taking it. The fear of losing my son pushed me to making life changing decisions. I made myself homeless due to inappropriate supported housing that I was offered at that time. I was lucky enough to be offered the chance to go to Amber, which had strict guidelines and boundaries with drugs and alcohol.
It offered structure, routine, support which would help me to start to live a life and not just exist. I was able to keep up with my appointments with my drug rehabilitation, and keep contact visits with my son. I had nothing but positive support from all at Amber which stopped my feeling like a failure. The programme gave me projects to keep me focused on my goal which was my son. I am proud to say that I have been clean of drugs for 6 months, I have been signed off by the CGL drug clinic and have proved to the services involved with my son that I am a capable father. I have been offered employment and will soon be starting my new job, my self-esteem has risen so much as I now know I can and will be living the life I dreamed of with my son.”
I had to do something
Jodie is currently the top student on her course – a Level 3 extended diploma in Dental Nursing – and she is rightly proud. It’s a long way from the street homeless young teenager who first came to Amber aged 17 but quickly riled against the structure and expectations, only staying a very short while.
In hindsight she says she wasn’t ready, that she was still angry about her violent family upbringing and wasn’t prepared to trust anyone. So there followed a further two years in which she moved about 30 times – sofa surfing, a hostel, the streets – occasionally getting work but never holding on to it. Taking more and more drugs and alcohol, until she ended up in a hospital bed.
“I lay there in hospital and knew I had to do something and I knew Amber would be the right place. The first 24 hours were scary but I also felt safe for the first time in ages and the staff were really supportive, they helped me realise my life isn’t over and I’ve got the chance to correct it. I’m so grateful to them because they had faith in me and sparked me to believe in myself.
I really wouldn’t be where I am today without Amber. It builds your confidence and belief in what you can achieve and teaches you how to deal with other people. And it gets you into a structure, which is something that really helped me – I was pretty much nocturnal before that. I’ve always liked learning and I’m now doing a full-time apprenticeship and hoping to complete my diploma in the minimum 12 months. I love my job and I’m planning to stay there but one day I’d like to study to be a dentist, if I can ever afford it.”
I’m 23 and have just qualified in the RAF as a Logistics Mover. However it has been one hell of a journey and without Amber I’m sure I would not be where I am today.
I was 18, homeless, had a terrible relationship with my family and everything was a general mess when I went to Amber. The decisions I’d made up until then were the wrong ones, only pushing people further away, until I finally reached rock bottom. A lot of people tell me now that without hitting rock bottom, I wouldn’t have been able to get everything back on track, and whether or not that is true, it was with Amber’s help that I finally managed to start turning things around.
While at Amber they provided me with counselling and helped me learn skills that have helped me to finally grow up and live a life I can be proud of. Amber also had us participate in the Princes Trust sailing expedition which was brilliant, and they also helped us to take part in various volunteering work with the Princes Trust and at the local village hall in Chawleigh.
Amber helped me to rebuild my confidence and team work skills and also helped me with understanding others personal space as we lived with one another on site. It also supported me to rebuild my relationship with my family.
I’m now raising money for Amber, the reason I’m doing this is because I’m now living my dream in my dream job and it would mean the world to me to help other residents to pursue their dreams and make a future of their lives, no matter what’s happened in their past.
I know that any donation to Amber will help not only residents there, but will also help the staff to keep the charity running as they try to provide all the essential day to day costs of toiletries and food etc.
I want to give back to the charity that has done so much for me, and will try to support them in various different events and fundraising to come, starting with my Disney half marathon.
To support me and Amber please visit my Just Giving Page
From Death to Success – My Amber Journey
I moved to Amber in 2015. But arguably my journey began on Monday 1 August 2011, 10:30am when I received a call from my brother-in-law informing me of my mum’s suicide and consequently, the start of the breakdown of my life.
I lost my mum, my long term partner, and mother to my then 2 year old son, within 3 months of each other. I moved house many times within the following 3-4 years, and became homeless twice. Furthermore, my cannabis use grew and I lost my job through behavioural issues on 19 March 2015. A culmination of failed counselling and psychiatry sessions meant that I was a mess by the time of my third and last spell of being homeless.
Six months later, September 2015, I was desperately searching for a room. Then, around the 7 September 2015, I got news that Amber were willing to house and support me and on the 21 September I moved into Amber, Ashley Court.
As expected the first few months were hard, the effects of drug detoxing, horrendous mood changes, physical changes, horrible sleep patterns, waking up after 10 minutes dripping with sweat. Nightmare. But slowly I began to come out of that period of change, growing more focused, confident and dedicated to rebuilding myself.
The change came for me in the form of fitness workouts, as my physical shape was battered from the effects of grief and 13 years of drug use. I started using the gym with a former Amberteer, and now good friend. I enjoyed it, but more significantly I was developing my motivation and discipline to progress.
After a certain period of time I suddenly became an informal personal trainer. Several Amberteers had become drawn towards my dedication towards my personal fitness and were asking to join me and since they had little knowledge I agreed. I became a role model for them, which I am still proud of today.
Over the last year I have worked really hard and I am now a qualified Level 2 Fitness Instructor and I am in the process of awaiting confirmation of my application to do a Level 3 in Personal Training at Exeter College. At the time of writing this I am a lecture away from being a qualified Level 1 Football Coach, and upon completion I am hoping to work with Exeter City to gain further work experience.
So I will be moving on from Amber, after 17 months here, as a very successful Amberteer. I have worked hard and followed the programme at Amber, have never got into trouble and saved money to help me move on. I have also saved for and paid for my level 1 Football Coaching and Level 2 Fitness Instructing Course.
Take it from me, get your head down, save money and rebuild your life at Amber, it can be done with your hard work and dedication towards your future.
The chance to start afresh – V came to Amber to escape a violent relationship. More than anything she was looking for a safe place and the chance to start afresh:
‘I needed support to get a job and find somewhere else to live so that I could start my life again. My self-confidence had been knocked out of me severely but it grew a lot at Amber and I needed that before I could start to look for work. Everyone was really accommodating and not judgemental in any way. I really enjoyed the team-building activities, going out on the narrow boat, and I got into fitness at Amber as well and started doing gym work. Now I swim 2-3 times a week and still go to the gym.
Amber gave V the support and encouragement she needed to get a job in retail and she is now a customer service supervisor. However, she’s also a big family person so it was just as important for her that the staff at Amber helped her reconcile with her family:
‘Amber gave me the confidence to go back to my family and say ‘’I’m here; this is who I am; this is me’’. If it wasn’t for Amber I really don’t know where I’d be now.’
I was in a very dark place – K spent six months at Amber. His past was ‘a life of crime, drugs, alcohol and being homeless – I was in a very dark place…….Amber helped me grow up and supported me all they possibly could – staff and residents – it kept me safe. It helped me develop new skills, learn new things and discover my passion for working with food. It’s an amazing feeling. I have a bank account, a provisional driving licence, all the things I never had. It really does give you the chance to change your life if you want to.’
Life is what you make of it – K was a Londoner who had got into the wrong company after the death of his Dad and ended up in prison for armed robbery. His mum was very worried about him coming out of prison and going back to the same crowd and same habits so when he heard about Amber he felt it offered him the chance to make a fresh start somewhere new, without any distractions. He had never lived independently so he benefitted from the routine of cooking and shopping on a budget and learning the basic skills of finding a home and job-hunting. Even more important perhaps, Amber provided a safe environment in which to ‘find yourself a little bit’, to realise that ‘it’s down to me to start to take the small steps that will eventually lead to my goal…’ K had a friend from prison who had also been at Amber and got a job painting and decorating so he got the qualifications he needed and moved out to share a flat with his mate. Since then he has slowly worked his way into sales and customer service, discovering ability with computers and e-commerce that his led him to a good job in sales with an IT company: ‘I’m in a good place; working and taking things day by day. Bad things happen but life is what you make of it and I believe in making every day count for something.’
This is where my life turned upside down. I got expelled from every school I went to and smoked weed all the time, so at 12 yrs old my parents signed me into care. I suppose they did that to try and help me out but it was the start of a downward spiral into drug addiction, burglaries, stealing, homelessness and ultimately prison where I heard about Amber.
When I first arrived at Amber I was very unsettled and ended up getting suspended for two weeks, which made me realise that if I wanted to sort out my life I was going to have to work very hard. I quickly realised that the more I helped myself, the more Amber would help me achieve what I wanted in life, which they have. Not only do I have a great relationship with my kids and family because of the progress I have made, I also have my own flat and a great job in customer service. I am very lucky to have what I have and so grateful to Amber.
So what was it that actually changed me? Well my team leader for one! he wasn’t just a worker, he was my inspiration. He helped me deal with my debt’s, open a bank account, build family bonds back up, pushed me to follow my ‘dreams and desires’ and above all he believed in me, and that’s something I had never had. Amber staff put 110% into the Amberteers.
It was cooking for 30 people that first made me believe, yeah! I am good at something, then becoming team rep gave me the confidence to speak up and help, and now the ongoing commitment by staff who continue to ensure I am behaving myself and doing well. I must admit since leaving Amber I have found it hard – not living with 30+ people, not having someone to talk to when you desperately need it and not having that controlled environment – but after a few little bumps I am now very much independent!! I have a full time job, I have my driving theory soon, I can control my money and savings! I can go out for just ONE drink and I have learnt and said the word No more times than I can remember.
I would just like you to know that my time at Amber was one of the most memorable moments of my life. I will never forget the hard work, time and commitment that I put into becoming who I am now. I cried, screamed, threw tantrums and refused to clear up my plate! At times I even locked myself away in my room because I was so scared of living life sober as it meant facing my mistakes and dealing with my thoughts, something I have always been scared of. But once again Amber was there to pick me up, brush me off and point me back to the path I had missed before.
I really don’t know where I would be without Amber.
I lost my job shortly after leaving home which really knocked my confidence and I had to move back home. But with no job I became bored and de-motivated and I started to drink quite a lot. Soon I’d moved from just drinking at weekends to not being able to go a day without getting drunk. Being dependent on alcohol just worsened my anxiety problems, and I found it difficult to leave the house, but of course I didn’t realise that, so I drank more to give me confidence to go out .
I did then get help from a therapist and eventually I got another job which I really enjoyed, and a room in a house share, but the anxiety returned and I became unreliable. Once again I turned to drink to help me through the day. I would go to work hung-over, even drunk, and find I was missing portions of memory because I was drinking so much. After a while I lost this job and was facing homelessness because I couldn’t pay the rent.
I’d caused so much heartache to my Mum and family that I just couldn’t go back home, so I went to the Council and they told me about Amber.
Amber pushed me out of my comfort zone because I couldn’t use drink as a prop, and when I felt so ill because I wasn’t drinking the staff were brilliant and helped me through it. The routine at Amber was just what I needed to give me a reason to get up every day and soon I was feeling more confident, learning a lot of new things, meeting new people and making good friends. When I began to apply for jobs the staff gave me help and advice with how to go about it and the very first interview I had I got the job!
A year later I am still in the same job, working as a chef in Café Rouge. The job was a new start for me in a new area of the country and I am so glad I didn’t go back home because I am sure the temptation to go back to living the way I was would have been too strong. I’m really proud of what I’ve achieved and I could never have done that without Amber.
I was hanging around with the wrong crowd – I see that now – getting more and more into drugs and with every pay packet I’d put buying drugs before paying for my rent and food. I would stay in all day and get stoned, which wasn’t fair on Mum. My life was going nowhere.
Mum told me I had to sort myself out or I’d end up in prison or dead and looking on the internet I found Amber. I wasn’t sure at first and felt nervous at leaving my family and friends, although they were not good friends, but I gave Amber a go and haven’t looked back since.
I was quiet at first and didn’t talk much but the staff always recognised when I was struggling and they helped me get through it. Then the more involved I got with the activities and opportunities Amber offers, such as going to Bulgaria for two weeks to help refurbish an orphanage and going on the Rona II sailing yacht in Dublin to deliver her back to Southampton where the Rona Sailing Project is based, the more confident I became.
I left Amber a year ago having got work experience in a garage. I’m now employed there full time helping with MOTs and working towards being fully qualified to do them myself. A while ago my lung collapsed and I was off work for a few months but the garage was brilliant and held the job open for me, so I feel they must be pleased with my work, which is a great feeling.